My most embarrassing story
Right, good morning, my lovely readers, and happy Diwali… I have just started my part-time week. I've been at work the last 3 weeks and was actually really sick - definitely caught it from my friend's twins. I managed to get through it, but only because I was called from standby. I also officially did my last flight as an IFL, providing I pass the course for IFM when I come back. Anyway, surprise, surprise, I'm on my way to India to see my gorgeous, handsome, amazing man (I make myself sick of how soppy I am). Well, it's just over an 8-hour flight, and I have time to kill, so I thought, why not add a new entry to my blog. I didn't know what to write about, and a lot of the time, I go pretty deep. And you know my mind is so traumatized and likes to let all the negative out. However, I thought, today, let's give you something funny from my past to laugh at. Life is too short, and I'd typically not share this kind of stuff, but if it gets you to smile once in your day, then it's worth it….(if not, I smiled writing it).
So I'm going to tell you about an occasion at school. Pre-warning: If you are eating, I'd put the food away until later. Everyone has their funny poo stories, right?! If not, quickly tell me so I can delete this before too many people have read it!?! It was 23 years ago… (dear god, I actually am getting so old).
Okay, so to set the scene, I was doing exams for my GCSE (I actually did okay in them for anyone curious - smashed German and PE!) I didn't go to the best school, but it was okay as it was in St Albans and very close to my house, so we enrolled there. It was known to be the lower end of St Albans. (You'll see where I'm going with this soon). So this particular morning, I was in the canteen with my friends waiting for my exam to start; I was pretty nervous and going over last-minute notes… probably for the first time as I had never ever studied. I then decided I needed the toilet (nervous poo is a thing). Now, in our school, many kids were immature (hence the previous comment), and they used to throw toilet paper up into the ceiling, and it would stick, which wasn't a good look. So the school were fed up with this and made a new rule that you had to go to reception to get toilet paper in advance.
All I was thinking about that day was my nerves, so I skipped the reception toilet paper collection and went straight to the toilet. Now, I'm so sorry for the too much information; I feel it's worth it for the story. Anyway, I had to go for a number 2, and I'm not lying. It was impressive (Simon will never look at me the same if he reads this). Suddenly, I realized there wasn't any toilet paper, so I went into my school bag and used a bit of paper I had in there. I then went to flush the toilet, and of course, how was my luck? The toilet wouldn't flush; just leave it, you say… Well, I then looked down into the toilet and not only could you see the log I had left behind but my paper was peaking out in full flow with my name on it 'BRIGITTE SEGERS 10F'or whatever class I was in!!!!!!!!!
I was absolutely mortified but couldn't see a solution to this, and I was now starting to run late for the exam. I'm sorry, people, but I just left it, and off I went to sit my media exam. After the exam, I went into the canteen and got a standing ovation and applause from at least 30 kids…. They were pointing at me and said, 'There she is, the girl that labelled her own shit' (the rough school, they swore, haha). I have never gone redder in my life, and I don't think I will ever again! I could not unstick this label for the rest of my school days (thankfully, that was only 2 weeks). But yeah, at school, I was the girl that labelled her own poo! At least I passed that exam with a B, is all I can say.
P.S. Oh, and thank god nobody had camera phones in those days; otherwise, I'm sure it would still be circulating!
I'm still normal, right? Lol
xBx